DON'T PET THE POLAR BEAR
I'm an educator in a museum. I lead tours, write and teach programs, and organize family events. My office is accessed in one of our galleries. My door is usually open for visitors with questions, so I hear whatever's going on out there. I also walk the halls and galleries frequently, especially when we’re busy.
I present for your amusement "Things Overheard in the Museum". I wish to note that my tally for the number of times I’ve had to say “Don’t pet the polar bear” is in the hundreds and my counter for the Justin Beaver jokes aimed at our taxidermy beaver has broken.
04/18/2018: "No, I'm not going to shock myself for your amusement."
01/22/2018: "I just had to call down the to Planetarium to tell them to use their inside voices."
We are closed to the public today. O_o
01/10/2018: There's a couch with a cross-section of cushion cut away so you can see how the springs and padding are layered. Small child to mother: “See? Comet's not that bad, that was a REALLY bad puppy!”
01/10/2018: Teacher: “Wait you guys! Look, this is how New Jersey started!” Small child, pointing at Howard the Beaver: “Look! It's how NJ started!”
08/09/2018: “What are these wings for?” “Cinderella week.” “Is Cinderella a fairy?” “The Fairy Godmother is a fairy.”
08/02/2017: "Look at my slime! It's so fluffy!" Today's Maker Space project is an experiment with the slime recipe. There are scents, glitter, and shaving cream to try. I was walking down the hall and a 4 year old and his 3 year old sister came tearing out of the classroom to show me their baggies of glittery, poofy slime. I might be dead of cuteness by the end of the day.
07/25/2017: "I am notoriously terrible at limbo." I have no idea who said it. Now I'm walking around trying to make sure someone isn't ducking a rail.
07/21/2017: I have two small visitors in my office inspecting my Folkmanis puppet collection. "What is this thing?" "A bald eagle" "It doesn't look bald." "Can I fix this horse's hair?" "Don't put the bunny next to the alligator! He'll get eated!"
07/18/2017: In the natural history hall, students examine the musk ox. "That's a small rail, won't he just walk away?" "He's dead, Jim."
06/01/2017: "It's bird day! Happy bird day! (singing) Happy bird day to you..." There's an excess of silly here today.
05/30/2017: "Nothing to see here, just carting a T-Rex foot around." Guard parting students so I can get by with the cast I use for classes.
04/28/2017: "OMG its Justin Beaver!" By every single tween who passes by. Every. Single. One.
04/28/2017: "Wow. New York and New Jersey hated each other before we were a country."
04/27/2017: "OMG IT'S SO FLUFFY!!!" (The musk ox)
04/27/2017: "Is that a real beaver?" "BEAVER!" "It's dead." "NOOOOOO!"
04/27/2017: 4 year old to mother- "Don't touch the art Mommy!"